Handling Disappointment

Handling disappointment in life is like a ride on a see-saw … and it seems to me that I am better at enjoying the moments of riding high than the lows of disappointment. Or maybe it’s just that I prefer the thrill of sitting atop the world to learning how to handle disappointment.

I recently encountered a disappointment with my writing that prodded me into re-evaluating my why’s and how’s and when’s. But disappointment wears different skins. Sometimes it has to do with our career. Other times it has to do with people.

Sometimes it’s just a slow burn of discontentment with the way you thought things would work out in life.

I’m really speaking to myself and my own soul, but maybe you can relate?

I mean, on some level it just feels easier to bunker down and let the event pass by and never think of it again. Become invisible. Move along when the wind dies down.

Ironically somehow the idea manifests in my brain that maybe in shutting down I can move on. Really. But is there any long term gain with shutting down? Not really. Although in the moment feeling numb gives the effect of not feeling so bad about it all. But what if there was an alternative.

Is there any real value in learning how to handle disappoint well?

Do we become any stronger, any more able to face adversity in the future if we ignore our disappointing reality of the moment, waiting for the see-saw to fling us into a better space again? When I’m honest with myself, I can see that it doesn’t make me stronger or any more capable in the future if ignore and shut myself down. So what is the solution? Is there a better way – there has to be a solution, right?

Well, if the Corona Virus Quarantine has taught us anything it’s given us proof that isolation and hunkering down alone is hard on the soul. And then when the Covid See-saw flung us back up again, when things started to re-open, that’s felt hard too right? Oh man. Feels like a mess … or is it …

Here’s the hope for handling disappointment

A mathematical equation can be solved, as long as it has a constant among all the variables. I’m not a math person, but I do like solutions! The disappointments have so many variables, and I don’t always know what part will pan out, and what part won’t. But the constant is the thing I can count on.

Here’s a brain bender for you: imagine Moses with a million people walking behind him. Families. Children. Elderly. An impassable Red Sea in front of him, and the worlds strongest army behind him and all those million.

There was a lot on the line for Moses – for some aching hours, it seemed to be a picture of a failed deliverance. Moses, handling disappointment in real time with a million observers with lives at stake. Then the way opened up. They weren’t instantly beamed up and over – all of Israel walked through the sea, on a dry path made by God.

The Constant in handling disappointment

God has promised that He will show us a way through, regardless of what we face. Handling disappointment looks like something in our lives. So, what does that look like?

The beauty is that no matter what derailing incidents come up against us, the strength of the Almighty One is within us.

This point seems easy enough to believe when things are going well. When things are hard it’s a challenge to let go of what we thought would be, and receive what God has for us in the moment. It takes trust, so that we can walk through the sea that’s been parted, instead of looking for a way around it.

Isaiah prophesied in chapter 40 verses 25-31 that the power and strength of God will be released on the inside of us. When we look to and eagerly wait for God in the middle of it all He comes. His strength renews us deep in the well of our inner person. And this translates into a foundation of being that keeps us from being rocked and shaken when disappointment slams us hard.

God’s way shows us not only how to handle disappointment, but to gain momentum off of it. God likes to turn things around that the enemy would like to stall or stop us with, and God delights in redeeming and restoring.

It starts with a new perspective. Starting to see our life from the position of victory carves out the space that we need in our hearts to receive His hope and peace. Sound hard? Not actually. It requires us to lay down our hard core agenda, and let God work the disappointment out for our good.

Handling disappointment with God’s help and strength

Handling disappointment with God’s help and strength means we take a step back (not to disappear), but to let God shine His light on the space that has become clouded over by discouragement and all the minions that travel with hardship.

Lord, be a lamp to our feet and a light to our path (Psalm 119:105). Part the heavens and come down … reach down from on high, take a hold of us. And draw us out of the deep waters and place us on the Rock, Jesus – our firm foundation (Psalm 18, Psalm 40, Matthew 16:18).

So glad God is with you and me on this daily journey. May we keep our eyes open to His light, and our feet on the path marked out for us.

Much love,

Jenn

PS. Keep your eyes and ears open for the release of my new book: Hope Breaks Through: Discovering God’s Signs in Your Life. It can be a self-directed or a 30 day journey to uncover personal signs from God for healing, direction and transformation. Details for book purchases will be available here: in Resources & Updates.

Copyright (c) 2020 Jennifer Bryant-Choong. All Rights Reserved.